The holidays are over. I expect happy and rested faces, but what do I see?
I meet 3 interesting couples:
1) Two students holding their heads in their hands – will they pass the entrance exams for secondary school?
2) Two pale girls – will they succeed at an interview for a new job?
3) Two managers eating antidepressants for breakfast – will they get through an important business meeting?
Three different couples, one common stress: what if it goes wrong. What if the teacher, recruitment manager, business partner finds out I am not “good, smart, strong enough”? What will my aunts, grandmas, neighbours think of me?
All of them have to face challenges and that´s all right. However, all of them want to show those around them who they are and what they know. Shouldn’t they primarily show themselves, though? Aren´t they heading for disaster because of the way they think? Why does it matter so much what others think about us?
We are all different. It is not technically possible to satisfy and please everyone. No matter what we do, there will be people who like it more, and those who like it less. There will always be someone who criticises the way we think, make decisions, and act, because they think, make decisions and act differently. Just because one person won’t accept us, according to their criteria, doesn’t mean we are bad, stupid, or weak. Quite the opposite; it means we are still the same.
It is easy to be accepted by others. You need to appeal to them. It means being how they wish us to be. However, it also means not being true to ourselves, not being authentic, and often feeling ashamed of whom we are at heart and trying to hide it. It is like walking blindfolded and having someone guide and navigate us; telling us what we should be doing, what we are allowed to do and what is inappropriate. Do we really feel good, smart, and strong enough then? Is this the happiness and success we long for?
I wish for everyone to succeed. However, the harsh truth is that it is not only you that matters at an exam, interview or meeting. Try to be the best you can at the given moment but for your own sake, do not put a mask on. Don’t pretend that you are someone else. And if you do not succeed accept it as a lesson, for yourself and not for your relatives. After all, these are the 5 main reasons why you do not need to show anything to others:
Please, continue to the 2nd page