Three men were each keeping a secret from a woman in their lives. Each asked me, “Are we supposed to reveal it or keep it?”
I provided each of them the same piece of advice, “Be honest – this is the main thing. Honesty does not necessarily mean saying everything you think about, but if you say something, it should be honest.”
Because I know women.
After some time, I heard from the three men. All of them were lifeless…
Their three different relationships – friend to a female, husband to a wife, and employee under a female superior – all came to an end: breakup, divorce, loss of job.
The women asked them directly about their secrets – and the gentlemen had lied.
“How is it possible that the women found us out?” they said, surprised. “And how could things finish so abruptly?“
Dear reader, do you keep a secret from any person (a partner, friend, colleague)? Are you ready to lie to a direct question? I discourage you from that – think again – especially if that person is a woman. There follow 10 reasons why it is impossible to lie to a woman for a long period of time; the price of dishonesty is surely not worth paying.
1st reason: Women are not men.
This is hardly a major discovery, so I would like to give you more details.
Men believe in the effect of their lies because they see them and judge them from a male point of view. A man believes that if he deceives someone, he will succeed. However, women are guided by something more than by the brain – by something which is more developed in them than in men. Many men do not even believe that it exists – intuition.
As I write in the book Twelve Hearts, biology has caused women to be closer to nature. They are more sensitive. Therefore they have stronger feelings. So due to their increased intuition, through some inner litmus paper which guides them, they “know” what the brain is not able to name.
2nd reason: When a woman asks a question, it is not because she does not know the answer but because she already knows it.
“How could you know it?” the man asks, in surprise.
“Well, I KNOW…“the woman answers, and always SMILES in a strange way.
What I highlight is incomprehensible for men: How could she “know” and how can she “smile” when revealing a lie?
The woman uses the word “I know” to express what she actually “feels”. And she laughs because she asks for only one reason – curiosity to hear the man’s answer. The sweetest satisfaction of a woman is to listen to somebody’s lie when she knows the truth.
However, there exists something what the woman does not know yet:
3rd reason: A woman never knows what is worse – the man lying to her or the man thinking that the woman is so stupid that she believes his lies.
This results in the feeling which a woman gets from a liar. It is not hatred. It is not disdain.
If I should describe in words the feeling which the woman has at the moment of discovering a lie, I would say she is unhappy. Not because of the man lying to her, but because she cannot trust him after that moment.
4th reason: To lie to a woman is the fastest way to become a stranger to her.
Men do not attach much weight to telling lies. They say in general, “Everybody lies… Women lie about their age, men about their income. Women like falling in love through what they hear and men through what they see, and both contain elements of untruthfulness.”
However, I repeat, dear gentlemen: Women do not view lies as men do. They are not men.
Most women have two life rules: 1. Do not lie to anybody who trusts you. 2. Do not trust anybody who lies to you. If we add 1 and 2, we realise that when a man lies he pushes the woman towards breakup.
5th reason: Women do not negotiate the lie.
To achieve a successful career in sport, men can imagine the so-called small lie. Look at soccer players. While taking part in this most popular of sports (right under the public gaze) they SIMULATE in front of cameras that somebody kicked them. After all, a man made up the saying: The end justifies the means.
However, women are like traffic lights. They shine or do not shine. They do not expect semi-red or semi-green colours at intersections. It is like that in their whole life:
They are or they are not pregnant – nothing else exists between. Men can be relied on or not – nothing else exists between. Whereas a man is able to argue, “But OTHERWISE I have been faithful this year…”
The woman is naturally given clarity of vision: Small or big – it is still a lie. The lie is still a lie irrespective of the reason given by a man. The woman often defines the lie as a show of selfishness.
To the woman, a lie is an act of deliberate and wilful harm to another person. To the woman’s logic, harm is the polar opposite of love, just as the lie is the polar opposite of trust.
And here we are – in the heart of the matter:
What is the key feeling of the woman? What should any man take into consideration?
Please, continue to the 2nd page.